Lessons from Irene

Just in case you were wondering... WE SURVIVED! Irene killed our electricity for a day and half, threw tree branches across our yard, and made us miss the summer finale of Leverage. But we're ok! And not only did we survive, but I also learned a few things.

#1 God answers prayers. The news had been reporting for days that this could be the storm of the century. Our local weathermen were predicting the storm to make landfall right over our heads as a Category 3. Instead, Irene began to break apart some before hitting us as a Category 1. What had the potential to be another hurricane Katrina turned out to be just a minor mess-maker for a majority of our area. And I am so crazy thankful to God for it.

#2 I should not spend all the celebrated hurricane day in my worn out pajamas. Because crazy people will unexpectedly show up to check on me in the middle of the storm. Like my boyfriend, Bob. So note to self for next time: Jeans and a comfy t-shirt.

#3 I am way too addicted to Facebook. It nearly killed me that our cell service was out and I couldn't check my news feed or post statuses about the hilarous thing my mom just said. I actually had to handwrite notes to remind me of what I needed to post when I had service again! Can you believe that?! Who handwrites anything anymore anyways?! Crazy, I know!

#4 We have the absolute best neighbors. The Wachs next door allowed us to plug in to their generator to power our fridge and some fans so we could sleep that night. I pray God blesses their socks off. If we ever end up moving out of this house, I will see to it that our new place has an open house next to it so the Wachs can follow us.

#5 LED flashlights are the bomb dot com. I stole acquired this teeny three-bulb LED flashlight from the church and used it when I had to walk around in my dark and scary house. Not only did it keep the vampires away (I've had too many nightmares about them lately to deny their presence just beyond my line of sight), but it was also super useful for temporarily blinding sisters. Everyone should have one.

#6 Storms are the perfect opportunities to mess with our cats. The hard rain and loud wind makes Patches skiddish. So when I sprinkled some water on the unsuspecting kitty at 3 am, she got crazy wide-eyed and jumped back about five or six times before running at full speed down the hallway. Dad and I nearly fell out of our chairs laughing.

#7 It doesn't take much to make me laugh a lot when I'm missing out on sleep. See #6.

Thank You

It was like a scene out of the newest action movie. The brave cop and hero of our film switched on his blue flashing lights and pressed the gas pedal to the floor. Chasing the speeding SUV down the crowded road, he swerved around the other drivers while requesting reinforcements. It was a dangerous game of cat and mouse as both the law-breaker and the cop waited until the other would make a mistake resulting in either the capture or escape of our villain. Finally in a flurry of broken car parts, the criminal lost control, slamming into another vehicle into a ditch and sending himself off the road and into a nearby parking lot.

This scene did not unfold on a screen in a packed theater, but rather just a few yards in front of me yesterday afternoon. After spending the day with family and friends, I was driving Grace and Bob home in my car when we witnessed the wreck. Our jaws dropped as I pulled to a stop on the busy road and we watched wide-eyed as the cop jumped out of his car, pulled his gun on the criminal, then tackled him to the ground. I would have got out to check on the person in the other car, but if they were severely hurt I would have been hysterical and only got in the way of the others who had already rushed to their aid. So when we had a chance, we left the scene and continued home another way.

Only Bob did the driving instead of me. I was so overcome with anger toward the idiot driver that I couldn't think straight. How could someone have such little respect for human life that he would endanger everyone sharing the road with him? Did he even care about the person he had just slammed into? If I had been the cop, I wouldn't have let the man surrender, I would have emptied my gun on him at my first chance. (Now that I know how to shoot one, Mwahahaha) As these thoughts and questions swirled in my mind, I grew steadily more angry and I tried my best to keep from cursing.

It wasn't until later that night when another thought consumed me. What if we had been just a few cars further ahead? What if we were the ones he hit? Would we have survived the wreck? If Grace and Bob had been hurt, I would have crossed the street and wrestled the gun from the cop so I could shoot the man myself. I know it sounds awful and very un-Mandy-like, but I really think I could have done it. When people I care about are hurt, I have the potential to get violent, and this would have been no exception.

As if whole ordeal was nerve-racking enough, thinking of all the what-if's and worst-case scenarios nearly cripples me. But I was skimming through of my Bible tonight when the book flopped open to Psalm 121. This is a Psalm of Ascents, from a collection of songs the Jews would sing on their way to Jerusalem as they crossed treacherous terrain. Verses 7 and 8 say "The Lord will protect you from all evil; He will keep your soul. The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forever." How comforting are those words!

I firmly believe God protected us yesterday. It could have easily been us in the other car, but God had His hand on us. He continues to amaze me with the ways He so obviously works in my life and my weak words of gratitude simply aren't enough. I want my life to be a "Thank You" to Him. I want to be pleasing to the God who loves me by living in absolute faith. (See Hebrews 11:5-6) He deserves nothing less.

I'm Sorry :(

For all my faithful readers out there, I owe you an apology. In the last couple months I've been super crazy busy and unable to type up a blog post. Therefore, you've been lacking some serious Mandy-induced gigglez and that's just not fair to you. So I am very sorry. I'll try to do better.

Instead of trying to explain in detail all the crazy things that have gone through my mind lately, I'll just give you a somewhat concise list of observations.

- Kissing someone while wearing a bathing suit will make you have triplets. That's what a pastor friend told me to discourage me from kissing my boyfriend Bob. I'm pretty sure he was joking. If he's not, I may be in a little bit of trouble. In fact, you might should start buying me diapers and such.

- I'm pretty fond of semi automatic handguns. Yes, you should be afraid.

- If anyone scares my momma with an idiotically loud car stereo, they will experience the wrath of Mandy. Don't laugh! I'm all cute and stuff, but apparently I can be quite terrifying when screaming at a bunch of hooligans in the Walmart parking lot.

- Thor, Green Lantern, and Kung Fu Panda 2 were all pretty awesome, I don't care what the critics say. I'm not really sure how good X-Men First Class was because I was kinda sleeping for some decidedly important parts.

- Owl City's new album "All Things Bright and Beautiful" is unbelievably happifying. Although it's kinda dangerous because it makes me dance while driving. You should all listen to the song "Plant Life". It's so strange but so dang adorable. If I were to pluck on your heart strings, would you strum on mine?

- I would kill for a slice of Oreo cheesecake.

- I should not watch silly Disney Channel shows before church on Sunday mornings. Because the laughter with my sisters will continue throughout the car ride, into the building, and then makes it difficult to walk up the stairs to our classroom. Although it's kinda fun being doubled over in gigglez on the stairs as weirded-out teenagers are staring at you.

If time and mental capacity allows, I'll post more often. And you may not even really care, but this appeases my narcissistic (Gosh do I love spell check) side. So do me a favor and pretend like you care, ok? Lovins!

My Deformity

Do you still have a webbed toe?

In a word - yes. I still have my cute little deformity. For those who don't know, two of the toes on my left foot are stuck together. I would include a picture in this post, but I don't want to alienate my readers who have weak stomachs and irrational fears of footsies. You can thank me later.

Occasionally I consider having it "fixed" but I'm horrified of needles, blood, and just the thought of surgery. If I listed all my fears, surgery would be close to (if not at) the top of that list, higher than death itself. But other than my aversion to surgery, there's few reasons that I'll make do with it.

Firstly, it made Mom sure she brought home the right baby. After going through 40 hours of labor and being three weeks late (which she reminds me about on a regular basis), she woulda hated to come home with the wrong kid. Although during the first six months of my upset tummy, she might have wished I got switched at birth...

My little deformity also makes an awesome conversation topic as some people are amazed and calling all their friends over to see it. Either that or their faces twist in disgust which can be quite hilarious.

When Dad does the piggies thing on my toes, he starts off with the big toe like normal saying "This little piggy went to market." But then he'll pinch the webbing between the special toes and say "And these two stayed home and had roast beef because they're joined at the hip." I normally don't get past that part because his rough old man fingers are tickley.

Even though it's so much fun, it does have its down side. If I were ever interested, I would probably be disqualified as a competitive swimmer. It's just not fair to the others than I'm part froggie. Oh, and I can't wear toe socks. And that's really annoying because some are ridiculously cute.

So I am still just one comment away from beating my comments record on my Ask Mandy post! Somebody puh-leaze ask me something interesting!

I Heart Chuck

What do you think makes Chuck such a wonderful spy, however awkward and initially ill-equipped he was?

I cannot tell you just how glad I am that someone asked this question. Many an evening has been spent analyzing this beloved TV show with my family. Sometimes I've considered simply dedicating my blog to Chuck so I can flesh out my theories and observations after every episode. But now since someone has asked, I can discuss Chuck without looking like an obsessed nerd with no life. Thank you, Amy!

The most obvious thing to me is the second edition of the computer in Chuck Bartowski's head that has helped tremendously. With the first intersect he had tons of knowledge at every flash, but not much in the way of courage and confidence. He was starting to gain some of that even before downloading the intersect 2.0 as he more frequently risked his life at his own choosing. But at the end of the second season, he got the upgraded computer in his noggin and followed an awesome fight scene with one my favorite Chuck lines: "Guys... I know Kung Fu." This new ability to defend himself with mad skills really boosted his confidence thus allowing him to become a better spy.

Another thing that makes Chuck such a great spy is the support of his friends. The former-assassin-ish and now-fiance Sarah keeps him emotionally stable which is super important considering effects of the unstable intersect as seen in season 3. Military machine Casey helped train him and continues to offer advice in both professional and (gasp!) romantic areas. And his little bearded friend Morgan gives him chances to relax and be his adorable nerdy self.

Speaking of which, his nerdiness is a huge help. He has disabled bombs with viciously malicious porn in the pilot episode and with apple juice three shows ago, so he's full of very unconventional knowledge that ends up helping more than Sarah and Casey would have ever expected. But more important than his nerdiness is his heart. Even when things are in turmoil around him, he perfectly balances government intelligence protocols with compassion. He gives almost everyone the benefit of the doubt and honestly wants to see others happy even if it means it's at his expense. *Sigh*

Yes, my friends. I am in love with Chuck Bartowski. And he'll never know it because he's a dang fictional character. Probably written by a bunch of women. Break out the ice cream, it's time to drown my sorrows in chocolatey goodness once again.

Now, I am one comment away from beating my comments record for an entry. Someone ask me a question under my post Ask Mandy so I can celebrate and break out the ice cream for something good rather than heart-wrenching!

Cuteness?

Fair Maiden, Why art thou so cute?

Although the question was submitted "anonymously" the writer gives it away in the first two words. It took me a while to come up with a satisfactory and not-too-egotistical answer, so you better appreciate it Sir Luther!

My first response is a question - When exactly did you last get your eyes checked? LOL and thank you for the compliment. I'll be sending your check in the mail within the week.

I guess my "cuteness" begins with my genes. My dad is ok, but luckily my mommy's adorableness completely eclipsed daddy's mediocrity. Unfortunately I do have my father's crooked teeth which I like to think adds to my charm. If anything, it just makes me undeniably my father's daughter which can be either a good or a bad thing depending on how he is behaving in public. (I love you, Daddy!) The only thing I'm really upset about concerning my genes is that my grandfather was selfish and refused to pass down the I-eat-all-the-time-and-still-don't-gain-an-ounce genes.

My still-developing fashion sense however comes from neither parent. Dad is hilariously color blind and mom is very simple when it comes to clothes. So I relied on my addiction to Disney Channel to give me some pointers on fashion. Don't laugh, it's a great resource! I was so giddy one day when the most fashion-conscious character on the channel had the same shirt I had, it made my week. I generally stick to jeans and wear Rainbow flip-flops ten months out of the year, but try to dress up the native beachcomber look with a cute top and some layering if I feel like it.

I'd also like to think it has something to do with my personality. Though I am so very far from perfect, I'm steadily working towards this type of beauty described in the Bible. 1 Peter 3:3-4 reads "Do not let your adornment be merely outward - arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God." Wow, I've got a looooooong way to go!

So there's my answer. If anyone wants to know my oh-so-awesome opinion on something, post your question as a comment on my Ask Mandy entry! To be honest, half the reason I wrote that request was to beat my record of comments which currently sits at six and two of which were my own. As of right now, I have three more to get! Now somebody ask me a question, dangit! Kthanxbai!

Most Profound

I am always looking for new Bible study books. I've got a couple shelves in my room, and a huge one in my closet, filled with books I've completed. There's a great one on the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5-7, and an excellent Beth Moore study entitled "Believing God", oh and several notebooks filled with handwritten copies of Psalms and my personal reflections. And I've got even more books that I'm dying to go through when I can find some time.

Along with countless other Christians, I am always on the search for some new profound discovery about God. Hungry to know Him more, we dig into the Bible and get help from some pretty brilliant scholars. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but I fear that in the process we forget already know the most profound thing...

"For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation." - Romans 5:6-11

This Easter weekend isn't about egg hunts, bunnies, new dress shopping, and awesomely delicious dinners with family. It's for remembering the most profound Biblical truth - that God loves us and sent Jesus to die for us, and then defeated sin and death itself by resurrecting Him.

Thank you Abba Father for loving me so much!

Release the Kraken!

In the event of the zombie apocalypse, what would be your battle plan? Who would you bring? What would you use as a weapon? Would you last past the first few hours?

I hate giving away my strategy for the zombie apocalypse, but since you asked...

The most important part of my plan is the prep work to be done well before they're actually walking the streets. Using my radio connections, I'll install giant speakers underground that will rise above ground when the apocalypse happens. Barricaded in my station studio and knowing zombies' love for pop music, I'll air some "Thriller" first, just to see them dance. And then I'll suddenly switch from pop to the opposite of pop - country. Upon hearing the horribleness in their picky and decaying ears, they'll simply disintegrate.

The people I would bring? Well that's easy! Much like former presidential candidate Mike Huckabee's policy on illegal immigration, I'll just place Chuck Norris between me and the baddies. But to make it a little easier for his 70-year-old self, I'll also enlist the help of Bruce Campbell (totally loved Burn Notice: The Fall of Sam Axe, by the way) and Bruce Willis. These two would be affectionately known as the Backup Bruces while Chuck's code name would be The Kraken. Mostly because I want to go all Liam Neeson and epically scream "Release the Kraken!" My command would confuse the zombies as they would be looking for a giant monster, when what they should be fearing is the possibility that the combined awesomeness of Chuck and the Bruces may cause the world to explode. Having those three is a big risk, but I think it's worth it.

Based on the two previous steps, there wouldn't be much need for a personal weapon. Not many, if any at all, will survive both the music treatment and my team of defenders. But like all my fellow ninjas, I'll use whatever is within arm's reach to my advantage. I can blind them with post-its over their eyes, staple their noggins, and tape their legs together. Then I can beat them with mic stands and office chairs while making Star Wars light saber sounds, you know, to make it fun!

And would I last the first few hours? Two words: Duh! Winning!

Anyone else have good questions? Leave a comment on my Ask Mandy post. I'll be writing up the next answers soon!

I Totally Rock

Does that sound a little conceited? Oh well. :P

So graduation from Carteret Community College was almost a year ago. And as of two months ago, my work life had been exactly the same as it was when I was in school. Minus sneaking in some homework every now and then, of course. It kinda bummed me I had this pretty piece of paper but nothing really to show for it.

Feeling like I was ready for something new, I applied for a producer job at a Christian music station in South Carolina. I had listened to this station when I was younger, so I was all excited about the possibility. But a couple weeks after sending in my resume and clips of my on air experience, I got a letter informing me that the position had been given to someone else. Bummed times two. At least they told me though, right?

I then applied for a receptionist job in town, but never heard anything back on that. Bummed times three.

In February there was a significant turn of events. I was asked to fill in for my coworker Ken while he was to be out for an operation and the recovery to follow. Our operations manager/my immediate boss/personal entertainment Shane cited my degree in computers as one of the reasons they wanted me to start to learn and take over these responsibilities. Ken showed me the very basics of entering simple commercial orders and creating logs. I was a newbie, but I felt confident in the few things I needed to do in his expected absence.

But that expected absence suddenly grew longer as Ken experienced some complications. Before I knew it, there were things that needed to get done that he had not shown me how to do. After overcoming the initial shock that I'm sure each deer who's ever been caught in headlights feels, I dived into the system and spent several hours reviewing the way he put in some old complicated orders and was able to figure it out and enter the new ones.

While papers were flying all over the place and fingers were typing at break-knuckle speeds, the excitement of finally knowing how to do the task made me giddy. Or maybe that was just the multiple caffeinated sodas and strong dose of Excedrin running through my system?

Anyways, Shane told me he was impressed that I was able to figure it out. Giddy times two.

But here's the kicker. He said that in the presence of my paycheck-signing boss Lockwood. Giddy times three, baby!

For the last two months, I've continued to figure out more tasks and I have rocked them all. I'm learning so very much and enjoying the perks that go with this exhausting full-time schedule. Mainly in the paycheck area. But also in a real sense of accomplishment.

Just recently, I had an eye-opening "Aha!" moment. Neither the SC producer job, nor the not-really-what-I-wanted receptionist job worked out. And while it made me sad for a moment, God had something better in mind. I had this great opportunity to learn so much more in the comfort of my own workplace. All without having to leave my family or take a step down in my employment situation. He is so good to me!

While things have been cool for me, Ken is still experiencing some problems. Please keep him in your prayers. He would appreciate them.

And don't forget to leave me a comment on my Ask Mandy post! Working on answers soon!

Ask Mandy

I was talking to my friend Katrina today and she gave me a fun idea. She suggested making an advice blog where I answer reader's questions. I can't make a brand new blog right now (because it takes me an eternity to design one that looks decent to me... darn my pickyness), but if you leave me a comment on this post, I'll make up a response in an entry to be posted later.

This is a great chance for you to ask me whatever you want, silly or serious, and I'll answer it to the best of my ability.

But I do have some restrictions:

• No politics. I want to keep it at least somewhat light-hearted, and I tend to get slightly angry and a leetle rabid when I talk politics.
• Keep it interesting. Ask me something that requires more than a simple Yes or No answer. Because one word posts would annoy the heckins outta me.
• Don't ask for my Social Security Number or my mommy's maiden name. I'm lots smarter than I look, thank you very much.
• And keep it clean. I don't want to have to delete your comment/question. And then send my mommy to your house to wash your mouth out with soap. Although that may be fun...

Now ask away!

Stupid Things

Quite often, I have some super stupid moments. Right now you're thinking "Well duh!" and I would be the first to agree with you. I've had more than my fair share of saying stupid things that I regretted immediately and buying useless items instead of putting the money toward my Chick-fil-a addiction. But I did something particularly stupid last night and didn't realize it until I walked out to the car this morning. This is what I saw...

Terrifying, right? When trying to fix my sticking gas cap cover thingy last night, I unlocked my car using the spare key. And then I forgot to take it out.

In light of recent car break-ins in the area, this was dangerous. If even a fully rehabilitated thief had seen this tempting scene over night or early this morning, he would not have been able to resist it. My car, complete with my bunny buckled in the backseat would have been gone. Instead of kicking myself like with other stupid things, I would have been crying and calling all my police connections to help me.

After the initial shock of realizing my stupidity, I couldn't help but thank God. He protected my beloved car and my cute purple bunny even before I knew they were in danger. Even in huge moments of epic fails, God still proves that He cares for me. I musta thanked Him a hundred times this morning while driving my safe car to work.

And then all day I proceeded to check outside the windows at work to make sure it was still there.

A Piece of Charleston

Spring... Nature explodes into beautiful, bright colors. Electric blankets are put back in closets until November. And pollen attacks your sinuses like there's no tomorrow.

This season is so darn pretty, but I've been popping Claritin like it's candy. My car is covered in the nasty yellow stuff, I'm afraid to touch it. I would give it a nice bath, but it would be yellow again by the next morning. Although it makes me sleepy, I've been glad for the recent rain that's been washing it all off the streets and buildings.

In spite of all the nasally issues, I'm still enjoying spring so far because of a plant we have on our back porch. Some gorgeous yellow jasmine vines have grown all around a post and now they're blooming, giving off a light and lovely aroma.

I don't normally get so happyfied over flowers, but these are kinda special. When Sam and I took a vacation to Charleston SC a few years back, the white version of this flower was all over the place. It twisted around light posts and utility poles, and climbed up brick building facades. Not only was it beautiful and natural, but it made all of downtown Charleston smell so pretty and added to its magical feel.

So my allergies at the moment are keeping me from completely appreciating this flower in my back yard, but it's still like my own little corner of Charleston. I can't wait to go back for a visit and walk the cobblestone streets, play in the fountains, and meander around the parks. But in the meantime, I can look out the window and pretend.

Sweeter Than Honey

Dad had to take off a Wednesday night recently to visit a church member in the hospital and left the lovely Mrs. Jane Garner in charge of the mid-week meeting. I absolutely adore her. If I didn't have such a great mentor in my mommy, I would want to be under the teaching of Mrs. Jane. She's so full of love for Christ and His church and she can also make me nearly fall out of my chair with excessive laughter. I want to be just like her when I grow up.

She is also full of love for God's word, which is what she taught about on Wednesday. And what she said really resonated with me. She read Psalm 119:97-104 and commented on the psalmist's words describing how he felt about the word of God. The primary idea was that he loved it. It wasn't just something he respected and read every morning with his coffee and bowl of Lucky Charms, it was something he treasured.

The psalmist also said that God's word is sweeter than honey to him. Now you can buy a bear-shaped bottle of honey for less than $2 at your nearest Walmart, but at the time this was written it was a rare treat. Instead of honey, I adore chocolate and my favorite TV show Chuck. But can I honestly say that God's word is more desirable and enjoyable to me than my beloved snack (that I probably already have too much of) and favorite story (which I may or may not be completely addicted to)?

Lately I've been incredibly busy at work with longer-than usual hours and several new responsibilities. Reading and meditating on my Bible has been a little less frequent and treated like a chore. But if I really, truly loved the word of God and desired it like this psalmist, I would have never gone a day without studying it. Through Mrs. Jane, God pointed out to me that night that my priorities have been a little off. And I'm so excited to see what God does when I really begin to treasure his word.

(Just to let you all know, you can be a better stalker now and follow my blog by email! Look to your right and follow the instructions!)

How to Bathe a Kitty

One of our cats is super old and apparently has become unable to bath herself properly. Poor thing. We tried using those special waterless baths in a bottle for kittehs and even some wipe thingies, but they didn't work too well. So we had to actually give her a water bath. And now I shall pass on my tips to you, just in case you ever find yourself in a position to bath a particularly angry cat.

How to bathe a kitty

1. Find a dirty kitty. And I mean really dirty. Even if your cat has just rolled around in in the most disgusting places in your yard, it may not be worth it. Instead, wait to see if your cat gets really super dirty and stays that way for a while. Only then should you attempt such a dangerous mission.

2. Grab the kitty and hold it at arm's length. I understand you want to comfort it and love on it and tell it that it'll all be ok. But as soon as you bring it anywhere near the bathtub, it will try its best to dig its sharp claws in to whatever is nearest. AKA, your flesh. And then you'll never get it in the tub if its arms are wrapped around you and secured indefinitely by surprisingly large talons.

3. Have one person hold the cat in place in the water while the other one does the washing. And that one person should make the cat face the wall so the temptation to claw its way out is lessened. Know that if it even thinks it sees the door, it will bolt for it and drip water all down your hallway, on your coffee table, and in those unreachable places under your couch.

4. Pour water on the kitty and rub it gently. Try not to focus on all the unknown stuff coming off the cat and dispersing in your water. You don't want to know. And if it seems like the kitty is kind of enjoying the bath, it's not true. It's faking, hoping that you'll loosen your grip and giving it a chance to bolt for it and drip water all down your hallway, on your...

5. After a sufficient cleansing, wrap your soaked kitty in a towel that is still warm from the dryer. Massage gently until much of the water has been absorbed. And then let the cat go and enjoy laughing as it shakes its paws.

6. Leave the angry feline alone for an hour and then enjoy your clean, fresh-smelling kitty!

Now that I'm done giving you all my hard-earned wisdom, I need to go nurse a wound. Who knew claws could go that deep!?!?

Letter to a Stranger

Dear dude in the steakhouse this evening,

You stunk! Please understand that covering yourself in your cheap cologne is no substitute for bathing. I wanted to enjoy my delicious steak and buttery baked potato, but I couldn't get the taste of your overwhelming stench out of my mouth. Try the scent of body wash like Irish Spring. Now THAT smells good. And doesn't waft over the booth divider.

Also, please shave your scraggly face and wear some shirts that are not a girly shade. Or how about a nice suit and fedora? I can imagine the grimace on your face right now, but give it a try. Your girlfriend would find it attractive. Or did you scare her away with your awful cologne?

A note about the next time I sit in the booth adjacent to yours: If you ruin my steak and tato again, I will have the waitress take the bill to your table.

Thanks!

Mandy, Sam and Grace

Fight

"...Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes." - Nehemiah 4:14

So many times I've seen someone I love make a mistake that wound up being life altering. I hated it for them, but they knew they were wrong and probably needed to crash 'n burn in order to learn their lesson. After some effort to talk some sense into them, I would give up and hope they grow up.

But this quite passive attitude is completely unacceptable. I need to fight for them. Instead of fighting with a sword or bow and arrow like in my favorite action/adventure movie, I need to fight through prayer. The God who has promised to answer that prayer is "great and awesome," and has already proven Himself to me countless times.

Jeremiah 32:17 says "A Lord Jehovah! Behold You have made the heavens and earth by Your great power and by Your outstretched arm; there is nothing too hard for You." He holds all that power, so granting a little wisdom to a loved one would be no trouble at all for Him.

Psalm 62:11-12 says "One thing God has spoken, two things have I heard: that You, O God, are strong, and that You, O Lord, are loving." So not only does He have that strength, but He also loves His kids. When one of the kids He adores requests wisdom, guidance, or strength to do what's right, He's not going to hold it back!

Obviously, He is the one who holds all the power. My words of advice to a friend are only so potent. So what can I do? Fight. Get on my knees and fight. Remember MY Lord who is great and awesome and pray for this loved one. I'm going to pray for a miracle and expect a miracle. And then I'm going to excitedly praise His name when He does something awesome.

Phone Etiquette

Part of my job at the radio station is answering calls and directing them to the appropriate individual. Not my favorite part of the job because I tend to get tongue-tied and sound like a babbling idiot. And now you're wondering why I'm in radio if I tend to get tongue-tied. Well if you weren't wondering before, now you are because I just mentioned it. And I hate to disappoint you with my lack of an answer, but let's get back on track, shall we?

So I answer the phone a lot. And recently, I've had several calls where I answer as normal, then the person asks for someone who either isn't in the office at the moment or does not even work there at all. Upon hearing my less-than-desired answer, they abruptly hang up on me. How rude!

Instead of calling them back and fussing them out for their rudeness, I'm going to record some of my tips on phone etiquette and hope by some miracle they stumble across this post. You know who you are. Take notes.

First, simply because YOU dialed the wrong number and didn't expect to speak to me does not mean it's ok for you to just hang up! People of decency should apologize and it is super nice if you'd wish the phone answerer a nice day. Only then can you end the call without acting like a jerk muffin.

Before you call, please have in mind exactly what you want to say. Write down a few notes to refer back to if necessary. Because if you're all confused and spouting out "um's" every three or four words, you will be thoughtlessly wasting the time of the person on the other end of the line and probably trying their patience. I generally have a whole dang speech prepared when I call requesting an interview. It goes something like this...

"Hello, my name is Mandy and I'm with the Talk Station in Morehead City, North Carolina. I was calling to see if Congressman Jones would be interested in joining Ben Ball on the morning show Coastal Daybreak to talk about his efforts to increase the North Carolina public beach access with Senators Hagan and Burr. (pause for big breath) Would this possible early next week?"

Normally after the quick spew, I take the next few seconds to really catch my breath as the Congressman's aide responds. It may be a lot of information, but at least I'm prepared and ready to do business, dangit!

Now I must take a couple paragraphs to address teenage phone manners. When you call a home and someone answers, don't just say "Hi" and expect us to know who you are. We are awesome yes, but not psychic, so please introduce yourself. Because when you start asking about the time of the youth event thingy my parents planned, then I'm twice as confused because I don't know what you're talking about in addition to who you are.

Please request to speak with the person you're trying to reach instead of assuming I am my mother. My mom is adorable, so I'm flattered, but still! There are five women in my house and only frequent callers have just recently begun to name us correctly. And sometimes even they have to go down the list of sisters before naming the right one. It's almost like a fun guessing game, but the only clue they get is "Nope, try again!"

So people, PLEASE talk on the phone properly. Ok, rant over. I hope you learned something.

Super Bowl XLV

While I truly love football, I wasn't all that into the Super Bowl this year. I don't know if it's because I'm battling a cold or just because I didn't really care about either of the teams. But it was still a super fun time spent with my family while we ate way too much junk food. If only the preacher hadn't talked so long tonight, we would not have missed the entire first quarter. *cough*Dad*cough*

Even though I didn't care about who would win, I chose Steelers from the beginning. But with about two minutes left of game time, I switched my already-shaky loyalty to Packers just to say that I was rooting for the winning team. And also because their quarterback was cuter. Yay Green Bay!

Commercials

I was hoping to see some awesome commercials, but I was really disappointed. Yeah there were a few cute ones, and a few super raunchy ones, but only two or three that I really loved. My number one favorite commercial was the VW Passat commercial that I talked about in my previous post. My second favorite was this Doritos commercial...



Doritos always comes out with some great ads, so I was glad to see another great one. I seriously LOL'd. Here's my third favorite...



I don't care anything about the Best Buy program, but I loved seeing Ozzie say "What's a Bieber?" and then have Justin in a ridiculous costume make fun of himself. I cannot stand his music, but props to him for taking a good joke.

Half Time Show

I'm not a fan of Black Eyed Peas, but in my opinion they were tons better than last year's The Who. Here are my observations on their halftime show...

1. Voices and Sound were pretty bad. I'm willing to give Fergie and her homies the benefit of the doubt because I could tell their sound peoples weren't doing a good job. And if the sound people weren't doing a good job, their monitors may not have been functioning properly either, thus throwing the singers off key. But off key or not, I still didn't care for the singing. Kudos to them for actually doing a live show instead of lip-syncing.

2. Fergie's outfit made me happy. Not only did she not dress like a loser, but she had on what looked like a football player's set of shoulder pads. And it was sparkley!!! I spent half the show fascinated with her twinkling suit. Am I easily amused? I think so. Everyone else's outfits were lighted too. Apparently their costume designer thoroughly enjoyed the new Tron movie, because the outfits were undoubtedly inspired by it.

3. The stage show was awesome. Usually there's just a simple stage and they let fans on the field to enjoy the concert. But this time, the people on the field were part of the stage show. Their lighted suits and carefully choreographed routine made for a visually appealing performance in addition to the band's weirdly suited stage presence.

Facebook Activity

Every now and then I checked my news feed on Facebook to see what was going on. Lots of my friends were either yay-ing or boo-ing recent plays and making their own (mostly disapproving) comments about the half time show. But then a post caught my attention. Owl City posted, "There's the kickoff. Legolas goes wide! BUT WAIT! Gandalf with the interception! He's running down the field shouting 'YOU SHALL NOT PASS!'" I had a blast reading his following several updates giving us play-by-play commentary of the Lord of the Rings football game going on in his head. As if I didn't love him enough already!

Cutest Commercial Ever

Wow, it's been almost two weeks since I posted anything! How can this be?! I'm way too narcisis...

narsicisicis...

narcistishasdjkhalskdjhf...

*sigh*...

fascinated with myself to let this occur on purpose! Anyways...

As an article on Yahoo notes, the web is abuzz over the new VW Passat commercial featuring a mini Darth Vader. And because I stalk follow my favorite actor on Facebook I was one of the first few to see it. So for the first time ever, I was aware of a viral video before it was really viral! Woohoo! Here it is...



Is that not just the most adorable commercial ever? It almost makes me want to go out and buy a Passat, which is a big deal because I'm in love with my Corolla. (41 more payments, baby! Yay!) Not only is the nerdy little kid adorable, but the daddy rocks. If only men like that really existed! Again, most adorable commercial ever.

I could go on and on about other commercials I love, but it's been a long day and I'm sleepy. I'm so sleepy that while checking out at the grocery store tonight I referred to my MVP discount card as an mp3. Yeah. So goodnight, all. I lahve you!

The Blizzard of 2011

On this unprecedented third snow day of the winter, we were expected to get just a dusting of snow. It was guaranteed that none of it would stick. Someone should sue our weathermen for lying to the public. Mom woke me up at ten this morning and squealed that it was snowing and it continued to do so until almost six this evening. And I spent my entire day watching it!

I want to show you a bunch of pics that I took without falling on my butt this time. If you click on them, you can see a much bigger picture.

Down the road before my house. Notice you can barely see the road.

Looking down the road running beside my house. I love how the snow is blowing sideways!

Still looking down that same side road, but closer to the end. Lookit all the snow falling!!

I love this picture looking from the intersection shown in the last shot because you can see just how big most of the flakes were.

Looking back down the side road. See my footprints in the tire tracks? Halfway down the street I realized it would be easier if I walked in snow-packed tracks instead of trudging through the 4-inch layer of snow.

On the back porch, you can see how much snow was built up on the table by mid-afternoon. Plus a pretty little Cardinal. They were all over the place!

Our little bird feeder next to the back windows was apparently the hangout of the yard...

Our cats quickly noticed that too. Zaboo and Patches rarely ever get as close to each other as they were here. There's nothing like a flock of birdies in the snow to bring kitty sisters together.

I am so loving all this snow!!! This needs to happen every winter. And our weathermen should be wrong more often.

Old Lady Awesomeness

Old age is so going to rock. Tons of people worry about their retirement and consider expensive cosmetic surgery, but I think I've devised a great plan of what I'm going to do when I get ancient and wrinkly.

I will live in a swanky 2 bedroom condo with Sam at an assisted living place. She'll have her purse doggie and I'll have my orange kitty. The kitty will be a purse kitty and enjoy it whether it likes it or not. I'll even have a basket on my walker and carry it around the building with me at all times. My kitty will be like an organic heater, so I'll never have to worry about having a cold lap.

Sam and I will host parties with the other old people when new episodes of our favorite shows come on. Chuck will be in its 53rd season and I will still be watching it faithfully and admiring Zachary Levi. We will provide the forbidden snacks and the entry fee for the visitors would be a case of Mountain Dew.

Everyone I've known throughout my life will remember how awesome I was to them, so they'll be willing to do whatever I needed free of charge. Like if my flying car isn't working properly, the annoying church brat turned adult mechanic will gladly fix my car because I always brought him cookies. The only downside to this part of my plan is that I have to start being super nice to teenagers right now.

I will bribe the facility's staff will my old lady cuteness, cookies, and the occasional Benjamin (a chunk of change now, but I'm factoring inflation) to bring me Chick-fil-a and pizza whenever I wanted. I can only take healthy old people food for so long, ya know? Those young sweet staff kids will be wrapped around my chicken-grease-covered arthritic finger.

I will take full advantage of the fact that white old lady hair tends to turn purpley. Just because I would be old doesn't mean I have to get the short curly 'do and constantly try to dye it my original brown. I'll have long, naturally purplish hair and all the hip kids will be jealous.

Instead of traditional Bingo, I'll start up an Apples to Apples club. But we'll probably be shut down before our third meeting because some people laughed too hard and broke something. And then I'll take the club underground and enjoy our gigglez away from the condemning eyes of the administrators. I'll make a rule that no one talks about Apples to Apples club. That should keep it safe.

Yeah. I can't wait to get old.

LOLs of Education

With a new semester at college beginning, my sisters are hurting for a little extra cash. One of the best ways to make a few bucks (legally) is selling old textbooks. So I helped them get a quote from the trusted site BookByte.com. The books we cannot sell will later be used for firewood.

As I'm searching for quotes on books that no one will take, I remembered a bunch of super useless courses. We all have to take those classes that are completely unrelated to our major in order to get our degrees and a "well rounded education." You couldn't see it there, but I rolled my eyes. I would go off on a bunny trail about how it's a conspiracy, but that would be for a later post.

For your entertainment, here is a short list of some of the courses that I found completely useless:

1. Introduction to Ethics. It was a pretty easy online course with a few papers and some discussion board posts. But the textbook we used had no pictures, quoted way too many politicians (ironic, eh?), and misquoted the 10 Commandments. Enough said.

2. Success and Study Skills. I got all A's through high school, so it was a complete waste of time for me to learn "how to study." You'd think my grades would tell the advisers that I had a pretty much got it. I was sure to take full advantage of the course evaluation comment section to discuss in detail how ridiculous it was.

3. Professional Development. Although the course was advertised to teach us about the professional work environment, we spent more than half the course talking about hygiene. No kidding. I'm a little insulted that they thought I wasn't able to bathe properly. Our textbook was from the early 90s, so when it discussed work appropriate clothing I lol'd and swore I wouldn't be caught dead wearing that. The fact that the book came with a floppy disk should have told someone that it was a little outdated.

I would love to hear about your most useless college courses, so let me know in the comments!

Found It!

While I was preparing for bed on Saturday night after a long day at the theater in Jacksonville, I looked in the mirror and realized I was missing an earring. And this was not just any earring. My family got me a pair of beautiful sparkly diamond earrings for my 21st birthday last year and I've worn them nearly everyday since. Sure, it's an inanimate object, but it holds so much sentimental value for me. I seriously love those earrings. Here's a much better picture of them than I was able to take...

So you could imagine my unhappiness when I discovered one was missing. On the verge of tears, I prayed for help to find it and then combed the floor of my room and the bathroom. I feared that it had gone down the shower drain, or worse, been lost somewhere in the Jacksonville mall or movie theater, never to be found again.

After more than 30 minutes of crawling on the floor and realizing that I need to vacuum more often, I had to submit to my body's exhaustion. Snuggled up under my blankets with my mind still wondering where it could be, I tried my best to get comfortable. But there was something poking my leg that made comfort impossible. I grabbed the tiny object and turned on my bed-side lamp to see that it was the back to the earring.

This shiny little ray of hope told me that I did not lose it down the drain or in town, but it had to be in the house somewhere. I ripped my blankets apart in search for piece with the diamond, but it was nowhere to be found. Once again, I was too tired to search anywhere else, but I went back to bed knowing that I would probably find it the next day.

Sometime in the night, I vividly dreamed about the earring. First I dreamed that I found it in the middle of my floor. Somehow I knew that wasn't where it was, but I was very close. Then I dreamed that it was in the play pen. (currently in my room for the purpose of hanging up wet clothes) While still deep in sleep, I remembered hearing something fall when I was hanging up a sweater there that evening. At the time I thought nothing of it.

At 4 am, I woke up and immediately threw off the covers and jumped over to the play pen. I carefully ran my hands along the mat but eventually got impatient and lifted it out. Then I saw it. Right next to the edge of the pen was my pretty little diamond earring. I giddily picked it up and immediately thanked God for answering my prayer and showing me where it was. And believe me, a morning hater being giddy at 4 am is a huge deal. Filled with gratitude, I placed my earring in a safe place and went back to bed with a smile.

In Luke 12:6-7 Jesus says, "Are not five sparrows sold for two pence? and not one of them is forgotten in the sight of God. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not: you are of more value than many sparrows." God cares for every little bird and He cares so much more for me. And not just about my major needs or requests, but also about the little tiny details like the number of hairs on my head and missing earrings.

It is such a great thing to know that I can ask God about anything. And it's even better to know that He hears me and answers me. I am so thankful not only for Him showing me where the earring was but also for loving me enough to even bother with something that's really very insignificant. It isn't like I absolutely had to have the earring. It's just a piece of jewelry and I would have soon been fine without it. But God turned this missing sparkly into a chance to prove just how crazy He is about me. And it makes me kinda crazy about Him.

Double Feature

For my sisters Grace and Sam's last Saturday of homework freedom before their semester beings, our family took the afternoon to veg out in the Jacksonville movie theater. Is there any better way to waste an afternoon than to see a couple stories played out on screen? Well as long as you smuggle in less junk food than I did today, I don't think so. I love those mini Reese's cups, but I should never eat an entire bag in one sitting again. Lesson learned.

The first movie was Tron Legacy. I saw the original 1982 Tron about a year ago because I was inspired by the poster on my favorite TV character Chuck's wall. It was soooooo hard to sit through because the "special effects" were pretty horrible and story was super slow. I'm sure it was awesome for 1982, but it's junk compared to 2011 standards. In case you haven't seen it, check out the theatrical trailer...



My nerdiness required that I see Tron Legacy. But based on the previews, I figured I shouldn't set my hopes too high. I found the story again to be super slow and really kind of lame. And they didn't even tell you who the Tron character was until the end of the movie... right before he died. And I have absolutely no idea what happened at the end. While the visual effects and the few action sequences were impressive and entertaining, I can't give a movie my seal of approval if I don't understand the ending. It was fun to watch, but I don't think I'll be seeing it again.

After a short intermission, we went to see Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader. It's been almost a month since the movie came out, so it's nearly killed me to wait so long to finally see it! I adore the books, but I was a little concerned when I learned they would be straying significantly from the book. While they made a few small tweaks to help the story flow a little better, they only made a couple big but actually acceptable changes.

Instead of the dark island in the book being just another stop in the voyage, it was an island controlled by a spell that frequently kidnapped people in a creepy green mist. And so in addition to the voyage being about finding Caspian's father's lost lords, it was also about saving the people who had been kidnapped by the mist. A little unexpected, but I didn't mind it.

One change I really liked is the length of time that Eustace was a dragon. In the book, Eustace was a dragon for only the duration of the their stay at that particular island. In the movie however, he was in dragon form for much longer. He was able to tow the ship from one island to another on a windless day when provisions were running low. He was also very brave as he fought the scary-by-mom's-standards sea serpent at the dark island. I'm sorry to Mr. Lewis, but I love how Eustace was able to learn a lesson on being helpful and brave before Aslan came along to rid him of the dragon suit.

The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe is still my favorite of the recent Narnian movies. But Voyage of the Dawn Treader is my favorite of the books and it was great to see it on screen and I really did enjoy it. Although I felt kinda silly tearing up at a mouse's speech. I wasn't expecting them to make another film after this one, but a part of the ending made me think that maybe they are going to try to do the next installment, the Silver Chair. If they do, I'll be sure to give a review and outline all the ways the movie differed from the book. You're welcome.

Mandy's Choice Awards 2011

So the People's Choice Awards winners were announced this week. I didn't watch the ceremony on tv, but I did check out the list of nominees and the winners this afternoon. And I couldn't help but lol. In nearly every category available, the latest Twilight movie and the actors involved won in their respective categories. Is there really any need to guess the approximate age and IQ range of most of the voters? I think not.

I find that my taste in music, movies, and tv shows differs greatly from the majority of America. So here are the winners of the prestigious 2011 Mandy's Choice Awards. Instead of a trophy, the winners will receive my undying adoration. Much more valuable then a plastic trophy, right?

Favorite Family Movie - Tangled

Yeah Toy Story 3 was great, but I was allergic to the ending. It made my eyes water. And Tangled's main character was played by my beloved Zachary Levi (Chuck). I've already raved about this movie's adorableness, so go refresh your memory here.

Favorite Action Movie - Iron Man 2
Normally, I don't care for sequels. (examples of sequel suckage: Spiderman 2 and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest) But because I loved the first flick so much, I was willing to pay the ridiculous fee to see it in theater. And I was surprised with it's complete awesomeness. Explosions everywhere. Very satisfying sequel. You must see it.

Favorite Actor - Zachary Levi
Chuck Bartowski and Flynn Ryder (Tangled). Need I say more?

Favorite Actress - Gabrielle Anwar
As Fiona Glenanne in Burn Notice, Gabrielle gave me one of my favoritest quotes ever. "If it sounds too good to be true, best to shoot it just in case." While I think she was prettier with a little more meat on her bones in the 1992 film "The Three Musketeers", I love seeing the tiny woman holding a gun that's just as big as she is.

Favorite Guilty Pleasure - Phineas and Ferb
Anyone who knows me well knows that I love this Disney Channel show. I know countless tunes from the show by heart and have a tendency to burst out in song at any random moment. And then people have a tendency to look at me funny.

Favorite TV Show - Chuck
Seeing a trend too, huh? I watched a majority of seasons 1-3 on dvd recently, so my opinions may be a little skewed at the moment. Well seeing that I'm currently deeply in love with the character of Chuck, I would probably be more accurate in saying that my opinion is undoubtedly biased. *sigh*

Favorite TV Duo - Shawn Spencer and Gus Burton
The fake-psychic pair of Shawn and "Magic Head" Gus makes me lol every episode. Shawn's childlike impulses contrast perfectly with Gus' practical personality. The only thing I don't like is that I miss half of the puns related with 80's movies references.

Favorite Album - "Stories" by Addison Road
I've been a fan of Addison Road since their first album. Within a week of first having "Stories", I was already singing every word to every song in my car on the way to work. And I might or might not have been dancing and scaring the people in the cars around me.

That's all, folks! Tune in next January for the 2012 Mandy's Choice Awards! You can purchase t-shirts in the lobby for $15.99. Make checks payable to the "Support Mandy's Movie Addiction Fund."

My Dear Mountain Dew

My Dear Mountain Dew,

Back in 2009, we had the closest of friendships. You were my constant companion during both the challenges of late night school assignments and the relaxation of my favorite television shows. Your energy revitalized me and your sweetness sustained me. Just my longing thoughts of you helped me make it through the day.

But what began as a loving friendship eventually transformed into my enslavement. The headaches that occurred when I was without you made you controlling and abusive. You managed to leech every spare dime from my white-knuckled grasp. My addiction to you was dangerous. I couldn't take it anymore.

So we broke up on New Years day of 2010 and never so much as spoke to each other for an entire year. At first your gaze was difficult to ignore as I passed you in the school hallways and the grocery store. You taunted me even more as I saw my friends enjoying your company. But I soon realized that I didn't need you and I had a great life in your absence. I forged strong friendships with Water and Sweet Tea and we got along well with no ill effects. While I would sometimes have nightmarish dreams about you, I was happy to be spending time with those who highly valued my health and well being.

After a year-long separation, you and I reunited on New Years day of 2011. No matter your previous treatment of me, I had forgiven and missed you and it was refreshing to become reacquainted. While I don't think we could have as close a relationship as before, I would still like to say that you're my friend. Maybe we could hang out some on the weekends like we did in the good old days. I'll be awaiting your reply.

Love,
Mandy

Goodbye 2010!

Thank God 2010 is over! For a while, I thought it would never end! All in all, it's been a pretty great year for me. Sure, it was sprinkled with challenges and some heart-wrenching disappointments as any year. But I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has blessed me abundantly in these 12 months. It's been so awesome that I simply couldn't move on to another goofy post before stopping to acknowledge some of the things He's done for me. Here's three of the main things that stick out to me this year...

1. Purchasing my new car! As my '95 Nissan Sentra was parked on its death bed, I had to car hunt in three of the hottest weeks of summer. After my first test drive, I was in love with a 2008 Toyota Corolla and God orchestrated the entire purchasing experience perfectly. I knew and trusted the only previous owner and got an excellent deal when I paid nearly half of the cost up front. I'm still in awe of how greatly it worked out!

2. Graduating with my Associates in Applied Science, Computer Information Technology! It took my nearly three years of schooling at Carteret Community College, but I finally left the place with a degree! I haven't done a single thing with it yet, but it's still a great accomplishment and the diploma looks awesome hanging on my wall. And because of the last two years there, I developed a good friendship with Katrina Barber.

3. Completing Beth Moore's Believing God study! It took me nearly twice as long as it should have to finally finish the study, but that's my own fault for being slow on it. The entire study seriously changed my life. My growth closer to God this year has been mostly due to Beth. It was so eye-opening and I can't thank God enough for bringing it to me. If you ever have the opportunity to do this study, please do not pass it up. You won't regret it.

Last year was good because of these three things and countless others and I am giddily looking forward to what God has in store for me this year. Jeremiah 29:11 says "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" I've absolutely no idea what my future looks like in 2011 - where I'm going or what I'll to be doing - but I know it's going to be great and completely perfect for me. Because of Him, I can have hope. And I'm about to explode of it!